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Learn the group conversation practice that will transform all of your relationships and bring you the love, friendship and community that you want

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Enrolling now: online cohorts of Authentic Relating in Community. See also ARC in German

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The global Authentic Relating & Circling™ community welcomes you! We are a thriving, 30,000+ strong, experimental community of love in action. We would love for you to join us, there are 100 ways to engage. Read about our history here.

The Circling Guide is the only independent (i.e. non-affiliated) monthly newsletter and event digest in the Authentic Relating space. Subscribe now and get a free draft copy of Marco’s new book Relational Power

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Relational Power: Make Friends, Influence Others, and Foster Connection Through the Practice of Authentic Relating

Read the DRAFT version of my latest book on the acquisition of Relational Intelligence through Authentic Relating practices.
This is the sequel to the Circling Guide, so if you have not read the Circling Guide, start with Relational Power

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Update Dec/2023: the Circling and Authentic Relating Practice Guide (the most popular book on the practice of Circling within the Authentic Relating tradition) has now been replaced by Relational Power and all of the practical advice from the Circling Guide has been integrated into it.

Given, however, that Relational Power is still in draft version (see crowd-sourcing updates), I am continuing to make the Circling Guide available. You can get it on Gumroad, Print, Kindle, or Audiobook format.

Other good Circling and A/R print resources are Sara Ness manuals, Bryan Bayer’s book, Jason Digges Conflict = Energy. Ryel Kestano’s new Authentic Relating, and the new free course at CircleAnywhere.

Watch the Circling Europe video

Courtesy of Circling Europe

PREFACE TO THE 1st EDITION: MY AGENDA

“No one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care” – Theodore Roosevelt

This book fulfills three deep desires of mine.

My first desire was to write a practice guide to Circling that could be read in one sitting and give the essence of the modality. A guide that might be especially useful to those of us with short attention spans.

My second desire was to share my excitement about the Authentic Relating movement, which has been so fun and so transformational for me in such a short time, in the hope of inspiring others to try it out for themselves.

And my third desire was to put Circling into the context where I think it squarely belongs: as a revolutionary practice aimed at extending the reach of loving kindness in the world. As such there is no sphere of life, public or private, that cannot benefit from the skills described here. You can practice Authentic Relating (A/R) with anyone, whether they are aware of your intentions or not, and if you do it correctly (which is not always easy) it is very likely that you will get phenomenal results with most people.

The Circling and Authentic Relating movement is currently the largest and fastest-growing global movement for teaching relational intelligence, other than NVC. Furthermore, it is an open-source (or non-proprietary) movement, which is quite rare in terms of human developmental modalities. I will expand on this topic (the place of Authentic Relating within the larger “we-space movement”) in Chapter 4.

However, the strength of Circling – that open-source makes it something of an anarchic, or “emergent” phenomenon – is also a weakness. I do not have any certifications from any of the schools of Circling, and despite this I have had considerable success in leadership, both in my personal life and community. As such I have a further agenda here: to encourage any and all “cowboy and cowgirl circlers” – meaning Circlers like me who are not formally trained or credentialed – to hit the streets and lead. Be aware that this is controversial and there is a risk in this, of causing damage. My advice: be humble, process your inevitable reactivity, and you will be fine. Authentic Relating is not “easy”, but it may be the most valuable thing that you can learn.

The focus of my writing and practice is to bring Authentic Relating to real-world problems across the board; but I am most interested in its applications in mental health (see www.seekhealing.org), place-based or land-based communities (see www.manifesting.net) and sexuality (see www.authentic.singles). If you are interested in these topics and want to support me or share resources, or else have any feedback to the book, please write to me at [email protected]. 

With love,
Marco

February 2021

Continue reading My Story and/or Offers & Events…

Donations – any amount appreciated!

Note: Circling™ and Circling Method™ are registered trademarks of the Circling Institute. Details here. 

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Latest News

  • Free Workshop: The Art of Authentic Relating & Circling
  • April/May Newsletter: Integral Circling. EU Circling™ trademark challenge
  • Free Webinar: Introduction to Authentic Relating in Community — Tuesday May 6, 11:30am Eastern / 5:30pm CET

RSS Authentic Relating Leader on substack

  • Marco and Sophie, v2.0
  • What happened when I fully committed to bringing Authentic Relating into all my relationships
  • Getting married and moving to Germany!
  • My discovery of Transformation at the Speed of Light (TSL) and its extension called TSL2
  • Trauma is good for you: Authentic Relating and "karma acceleration"

Upcoming Events

Upcoming events below and on our Google Calendar

Communities Map

Authentic Relating Organizations

  • Circling Institute (San Francisco and Global)
  • The Relateful Company  (previously CircleAnywhere (Global)
  • Circling Europe (Europe and North America)
  • ART International (Global)
  • Authentic Relating Go (Global)
  • Connection Institute (Boston & Global)
  • The Connection Movement (New York City)
  • Austin Circling Studio (Austin, TX)
  • Evolutionary Relating (Australia)
  • Circling Cornwall (UK)
  • Let’s Be Authentic (Philadelphia, PA)
  • Realness Project (Prison work)
  • The Awkward Leadership School (Toronto)
  • Integral Centered Leadership (Boulder, CO)

Local communities can be found on Meetup.com and on the Authentic Revolution communities map

Free Circling Video Course

Signup to the new free Circling course at CircleAnywhere!

Recommended Books

Quotes

  • “There is no place to get to but more here” — Decker Cunov, co-founder of Circling
  • “You will always outlive my concept of you. And I will always have a concept for you to outlive” — Guy Sengstock, founder of Circling
  • “Pain is not a punishment, pleasure is not a reward… good and bad, happy and sad, all thoughts vanish into emptiness” — Pema Chodron
  • “If we were all to sit in a circle and confess our sins, we would laugh at each other for lack of originality” — Kahlil Gibran
  • “No one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care” — Theodore Roosevelt
  • “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand. They listen with the intent to reply” — Stephen Covey
  • “Trust that people move towards wholeness, and we just have to follow” — Alexis Shepperd, co-founder of the Authentic Woman Experience
  • “Depression is the reward we get for being ‘good’ ” — Marshall Rosenberg
  • When we are angry, killing people is too superficial — Marshall Rosenberg
  • “You don’t need to get what you want if you can express what you want” — Strephon Kaplan-Williams

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Marco’s Books and Blogs


Relational Power: Win Friends, Influence Others, and End Loneliness Through the Practice of Authentic Relating

 


Broke, Single, Crazy and Old: The Redemption of a Sex and Love Addict

 


As Lovers Do: a Manual for Men

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