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Circling Guide

Learn the group conversation practice that will transform all of your relationships and bring you the love, friendship and community that you want

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The global Authentic Relating & Circling community welcomes you! We are a thriving, 10,000+ strong, experimental community of love in action. We would love for you to join us, there are 100 ways to engage. Read about our history here.

The Circling Guide is the only independent (i.e. non-affiliated) monthly newsletter and event digest in the Authentic Relating space. Subscribe now and get a free draft copy of Marco’s new book Relational Power

Be audacious! share to your network any content you like here (use the buttons on the sidebar!), and then read and/or review Relational Power

Relational Power: Make Friends, Influence Others, and Foster Connection Through the Practice of Authentic Relating

Read the DRAFT version of my latest book on the acquisition of Relational Intelligence through Authentic Relating practices.
This is the sequel to the Circling Guide, so if you have not read the Circling Guide, start with Relational Power

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Update Dec/2022: the Circling and Authentic Relating Practice Guide (the most popular book on the practice of Circling within the Authentic Relating tradition) has now been replaced by Relational Power. Relational Power is still in draft version and has been released to the community for crowd-sourcing.

However, the Circling Guide covers well the history of the movement, a comparison of the different schools of Circling, a practical guide on how to Circle effectively, etc.; and so I am continuing to make it available for free or small donation on the web. 

You can get the Circling Guide on Gumroad, Print, Kindle, or Audiobook format. Other good Circling and A/R print resources are Sara Ness manuals, Bryan Bayer’s book, Jason Digges Conflict = Energy. Ryel Kestano’s new Authentic Relating, and the new free course at CircleAnywhere.

Update for Asheville NC & Washington DC Areas

Please join the Asheville Authentic Community Meetup. If you live in DC, check out the DC Authentic Singles Meetup

Watch the Circling Europe video

Courtesy of Circling Europe

PREFACE TO THE 1st EDITION: MY AGENDA

“No one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care” – Theodore Roosevelt

This book fulfills three deep desires of mine.

My first desire was to write a practice guide to Circling that could be read in one sitting and give the essence of the modality. A guide that might be especially useful to those of us with short attention spans.

My second desire was to share my excitement about the Authentic Relating movement, which has been so fun and so transformational for me in such a short time, in the hope of inspiring others to try it out for themselves.

And my third desire was to put Circling into the context where I think it squarely belongs: as a revolutionary practice aimed at extending the reach of loving kindness in the world. As such there is no sphere of life, public or private, that cannot benefit from the skills described here. You can practice Authentic Relating (A/R) with anyone, whether they are aware of your intentions or not, and if you do it correctly (which is not always easy) it is very likely that you will get phenomenal results with most people.

The Circling and Authentic Relating movement is currently the largest and fastest-growing global movement for teaching relational intelligence, other than NVC. Furthermore, it is an open-source (or non-proprietary) movement, which is quite rare in terms of human developmental modalities. I will expand on this topic (the place of Authentic Relating within the larger “we-space movement”) in Chapter 4.

However, the strength of Circling – that open-source makes it something of an anarchic, or “emergent” phenomenon – is also a weakness. I do not have any certifications from any of the schools of Circling, and despite this I have had considerable success in leadership, both in my personal life and community. As such I have a further agenda here: to encourage any and all “cowboy and cowgirl circlers” – meaning Circlers like me who are not formally trained or credentialed – to hit the streets and lead. Be aware that this is controversial and there is a risk in this, of causing damage. My advice: be humble, process your inevitable reactivity, and you will be fine. Authentic Relating is not “easy”, but it may be the most valuable thing that you can learn.

The focus of my writing and practice is to bring Authentic Relating to real-world problems across the board; but I am most interested in its applications in mental health (see www.seekhealing.org), place-based or land-based communities (see www.manifesting.net) and sexuality (see www.authentic.singles). If you are interested in these topics and want to support me or share resources, or else have any feedback to the book, please write to me at marc@CirclingGuide.com. 

With love,
Marco

February 2021

Continue reading My Story and/or Offers & Events…

Donations – any amount appreciated!

Please support my work by joining my Patreon. You can also give a one-time donation through PayPal below.

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Latest News

  • February 2023 Newsletter & Events
  • Relational Power on audio; Request for feedback
  • Relational Power on audio; Masterful Lover with Keith; Relational Leadership with Jason; and more

Upcoming Events

Upcoming events below and on our Google Calendar

Circling Reflections

  • How to be authentic and loving in an emotionally illiterate culture
  • Circling Evangelist hits the streets in Guatemala: successes and humblings

Clickable Communities map

authentic-revolution-communities-map

Authentic Relating Organizations

  • Circling Institute (San Francisco and Global)
  • Circle Anywhere (Global)
  • Circling Europe (Europe and North America)
  • ART International (Global)
  • Authentic Relating Go (Global)
  • Connection Institute (Boston & Global)
  • The Connection Movement (New York City)
  • Austin Circling Studio (Austin, TX)
  • Evolutionary Relating (Australia)
  • Circling Cornwall (UK)
  • Let’s Be Authentic (Philadelphia, PA)
  • Realness Project (Prison work)
  • The Awkward Leadership School (Toronto)
  • Integral Centered Leadership (Boulder, CO)

Local communities can be found on Meetup.com and on the Authentic Revolution communities map

Free Circling Video Course

Signup to the new free Circling course at CircleAnywhere!

Recommended Books

Quotes

  • “There is no place to get to but more here” — Decker Cunov, co-founder of Circling
  • “You will always outlive my concept of you. And I will always have a concept for you to outlive” — Guy Sengstock, founder of Circling
  • “Pain is not a punishment, pleasure is not a reward… good and bad, happy and sad, all thoughts vanish into emptiness” — Pema Chodron
  • “If we were all to sit in a circle and confess our sins, we would laugh at each other for lack of originality” — Kahlil Gibran
  • “No one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care” — Theodore Roosevelt
  • “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand. They listen with the intent to reply” — Stephen Covey
  • “Trust that people move towards wholeness, and we just have to follow” — Alexis Shepperd, co-founder of the Authentic Woman Experience
  • “Depression is the reward we get for being ‘good’ ” — Marshall Rosenberg
  • When we are angry, killing people is too superficial — Marshall Rosenberg
  • “You don’t need to get what you want if you can express what you want” — Strephon Kaplan-Williams

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Marco’s Books and Blogs


Relational Power: Win Friends, Influence Others, and End Loneliness Through the Practice of Authentic Relating

RSS Marc "Marco" Beneteau's Author Blog

  • Relational Power: Call for engagement
  • Quick check-in from “the land of enchanment”
  • Moving to New Mexico; two new books!
  • Investigation of Dakota Kaiser and Starseeds Exchange – possible crypto fraud / scam in San Marcos, Lake Atitlan, Guatemala

RSS Manifesting Community Blog

  • Moved to Albuquerque, NM. New book!
  • Winter has arrived at Solidarity Collective! Plus exciting plans
  • New digs, new book, new life
  • New groups forming now; and other news
  • Dancing Rabbit Ecovillage (Rutledge, Missouri) — Visitor Program Review
  • On the road, in search of utopia

 


Broke, Single, Crazy and Old: The Redemption of a Sex and Love Addict

RSS Healthy Bipolar

  • Happy all the time with a low-grade CFS — is it possible?
  • Moving to New Mexico! New book!
  • Final days at Hridaya Yoga, Mazunte, Mexico
  • My Social Security disability hearing; a visit to the doctor and the dentist; and life in the communist commune in Wyoming

 


As Lovers Do: a Manual for Men

RSS The Man/Woman Game Archives – Authentic Singles

  • Online Dating and the Man/Woman Game: My Story
  • What Women Want: Towards a New Psychology of Love, Sex and Gender Relations
  • I have a Dream: the social-political context of love and sex

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